I have had a busy decade. I was best known in 2000 for designing typefaces and I start the new decade running for mayor. Somewhere in between I wrote and co-wrote some books and still publish a bunch of fashion magazines. But how has the world changed in the last 10 years?
My memory is a bit hazy after this time, but I think it goes something along the lines of the following.

2000

The year began with a hangover, with people waking up from millennium celebrations to discover that there was nothing wrong with their computers. Everyone had celebrated, except math geeks, who insisted that the millennium actually began in 2001.
Vladimir Putin became Russian president on the promise that, ‘If it’s not right, we’ll put it right. It is the Putin right that counts,’ which appealed to Russian appliance owners, who voted overwhelmingly for the judo black belt.

November: Texas governor George W. Bush begins to form a government, regardless of whether he won in Florida.

The Olympics opened in Australia, with New Zealanders outnumbered by other nationalities for the ﬁrst time on Bondi Beach.
Vice-president Al Gore appears in an unaired pilot for Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, and is advised to wear khaki tones if he is to win the presidential election. Democrats claim victory.
Meanwhile, George W. Bush decides to start forming a government regardless of whether he won or not, because his Daddy had won twelve years before, and he was just following his lead.
When Americans see the winter 2001 ranges at their department stores, to discover khaki was not in after all, Bush became president the following January. Queer Eye is shelved temporarily as a TV concept.
Saddam Hussein hires an extra double.

Tomorrow: 2001

Labels: 2000s, history, humour, politics